Siqi's Daily Happenings,: Back to square one/

Hello! I am back! It has been 3 months since i last posted here! Life has been a mess for me. I have gone through too many unpleasant things which i do not want to be reminded of. So anyways. i have officially stepped into the working life. I mean, yeah, i started working in march, but i was then only being confirmed as a full fledged teacher in June. I pretty much enjoy working in that centre despite the fact that the management really sucks. I was being offered a place in Wheelock, but eventually i rejected it. I wanted a more versatile degree. Or maybe i wanted to buy time to watch my kids proceed on to N1 before i leave to further my studies. In the midst of worrying about whether to further my studies or to work, something really bad and unexpected happened. This 18 year old cousin of mine passed away due to lung infection. Initially, he was admitted to the hospital as he was found with a brain tumor in the brain and thus needed to remove it. He didn't show any sign of recovery after the operation and in the end, the doctors there just announced him dead due to lung infection. I don't know how the hell it happened, but it just happened! I went for the wake, and i cried like a baby. He is one of my closer childhood playmates and then what? I can never get to see him anymore. This really breaks my heart. What is worse is the fact that, i have to conduct parent meeting the next morning. IS LIKE WTF?! Things were just simply not going well for me! Nevertheless, i pulled through and that conference was considered a successful one. As time passes, i feel really tired working in the centre. Teachers there are really irresponsible, really not passionate and they just love to complain and gossip about everything and anything. If you are not passionate and dedicated enough to be a teacher, then don't be a teacher. Some of their actions really pissed me off to nowhere. I mean like, you don't let children play toys 24/7 and not teach right? You don't just bring a child walking around while your partner needs to handle the rest of the children alone? You don't try to avoid carry out activities with all your stupid excuses? Like for fk? The thought of these reeally... Argh, i am raging while typing this lo ! Aiya, so anyway, i feel like i do not want to stay here for long and thus i went to look for some degree courses that i could probably take up. In the end, i took up a business course offered by UOL thinking that is very versatile and it's going to be very helpful for me as i want to to own a childcare centre of my own in the future. The whole process was tedious and complicated. Firstly, i applied for the course one week before the closing date, so everything seemed kind of rush for me. After which, i needed to defer my bond. I didn't know that the procedure to defer this bond can be this fking tedious. I needed to do a BG which required my dad to put in 52,000 into a fixed account, Those money will be "locked" in that account until i graduate. I was being notified to do this only 2 weeks before my school starts. Where to find 52,000 in such little time. My dad went to to the different banks to ask around and he even made an appointment with MOE and ask whether are there any solutions/ I really felt that sense of guilt towards him. His love for us is way too much than our's to him. Okay, back to the story, things did not just end here. We managed to get that amount of money, we went to the bank and have already settled everything. I went to school and while having my first lecture, i had the urge to quit. I didn't understand a single shit. or am i just still not used to it? The lecturer repeated three times! I could not understand at all! Then, a lot of things just started running through my mind. I really want to quit. Business is not my cup of tea. The thought of quitting on the first lesson, just showed me that how uninterested i am for this course. I mean, yes , i want to own a childcare of my own but that doesn't mean i have to take up a degree course in business? I can still learn along the way as i meet different people different principals ? During the last 20 mins of the lecture. i typed a long message to my dad, telling him how sorry and guilty i was and i wanted to quit. His replied was" It's okay, come home and we can settle it". I didn't want to go home, because i just didn't feel like to. So, i decided to meet my mum at north point after her work. The moment she saw me . she asked me whether i was okay and she didn't scold me at all. She is a very short tempered mum and i was surprised that i didn't get any scolding from her. To withdraw from the school was yet another complicated process. I need to fill up withdrawal form online, type a letter to state the reason, and i may need to pay a sum to the school. Also, i need to cancel my BG and i really hoped that, i can take the full amount back. I need to call MOE which i have to do so. So stressed. Even turning 20 in two days time makes me stressed out. :/ Can i don't grow up ? like pleaseeeee...

T05 girls.

We had so many arguments and fights during out time tgt in poly, but still, i am glad to have known you two :)

First aid training

Happy birthday, daddy ! < 3

My fave boy. Just today, he did something that makes me really angry. I told him that i was angry right i in front of him and turned away. He was like " Teacher ahmi. teacher ahmi, dont want~" He turned my face so that i looked at him, kissed me on my cheeks and then hugged me very tightly. The next moment i was like .. Okay, you are forgiven. HAHA. Kids are just really cute uh.